


The Rules of Courtesy

by navaan



Category: Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes
Genre: Christmas Cards, Gen, Gen Fic, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-26
Updated: 2013-12-26
Packaged: 2018-01-06 06:49:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1103752
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/navaan/pseuds/navaan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony really meant it when he said he'd put Doom on his Christmas card list.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Rules of Courtesy

**Author's Note:**

> Obviously set after the _Secret Invasion_ arc of the series

“Pepper?“

“Yes, Mr. Stark?“ 

Tony didn't even look up from the paper work she had shoved in front of him the very moment he had settled into his office chair, but went on scanning the papers and signing his name.

“Did you pick up the Christmas card I asked you for?”

“We've ordered the cards you picked...”

“Not the cards for Stark Industries. The _special_ one.” He looked up from his work to stare at her with a little smirk. 

She sighed and reached into one of the manila folders she was carrying to pull out a slightly oversized Christmas card with an old-fashioned slightly corny illustration and held it out so he could inspect it.

“Does it play music?”

“I wouldn't call it music, but, yes, when you open it, it makes some awful noise that's supposed to be _Jingle Bells_.” He obviously wasn't impressed by her lack of enthusiasm. “I'm sure if this was about a card playing music, you'd have built the perfect chip to do it in less than an hour... So why did you make me buy one?”

“Do we have the address of the current ruler of Latveria. You know, the man in the iron mask? Oh no wait, not that last one...” Tony said, smiling at her cheekily and probably trying to provoke her into showing her exasperation. “That's me.”

“You want to send a Christmas Card to Victor von Doom?”

“Yes.”

“Why?” Pepper asked, her voice rising slightly. She was used to Tony's antics, but he was resourceful – and crazy enough at times – to still surprise her once in a while.

Tony shrugged and smiled with the air of someone, who knew perfectly well he didn't have to explain himself if he didn't want to. “It seems like the right thing to do. Common courtesy.”

Pepper, not even sure she wanted to know what that meant, dropped the card in front of him and just turned around to leave. “I'll be back for that paperwork,” she warned, before she closed the office door behind her. 

She had a feeling she'd hear of this again. 

And soon.

* * *

Lord Victor von Doom stared at the abomination for a long moment, before turning to the unlucky person, who had sorted his correspondence this morning and delivered it. “What is this?” he demanded, while the opened card played the barely recognizable tune of Jingle Bells one more time.

“It's a... Christmas card.”

He wanted to throw the card at the idiot for his stupidity. “I can see that! Who dares to insult Victor von Doom?” he snapped, letting his anger seep into his voice. Then he looked down to read the handwritten message inside the card:

_Dear Victor,_

_Thanks once again for your invaluable help with that little Skrull problem. You're a brilliant man, and it's nice to know that you can do the right thing, when it serves your own purposes. A heads-up would have been nice, though, because we both know that you've been aware of the Skrull invasion from the moment you've kidnapped Sue Storm, you bastard.  
Would be nice if you could refrain from attacking New York for a while, or _ not _plan any petty invasions of your own, but as this is probably too much to ask, I guess, we'll see you around town soon. (Of course, we'll kick your sorry ass.)_

_Happy Christmas,_

_Tony Stark_

He crushed the card in his armor clad fist. “Inform the embassy. We have business in New York. Doom just received an invitation. One he can't ignore.”

Because who'd ignore a personal invitation from Tony Stark himself?

The city of New York would pay for his arrogance.

* * *

“Was this really necessary?” Iron Man's modulated voice asked into the distance, not sure if he even wanted Doom to answer. “It was a perfectly nice party without you.” Behind him people were screaming, scared by Doombots still trying to take apart the venue of this year's annual Stark Industries New Year's Gala. He remained hovering in the air, ready to strike at the bot that was getting closer, when a streak of red and white flew past him and knocked it down. From below Steve, or more precisely Captain America, gave him a thumbs up and jumped back into action.

“Do you think Doom cares for such trivialities?”

“Well, if you don't... Thanks for dropping by to see us. See you next year. We hope you and your family of robot children have a safe journey home.”

“You'll learn not to mock me, Iron Man.”

“I wouldn't be too sure about that if I were you,” Hawkeye quipped, from somewhere close-by, but outside Iron Man's field of vision. “Mocking is something he's really, really good at. Can't see him giving it up that easily.”

“Thanks, Hawkeye. That's really helping,” Tony muttered and tried to get a clear shot at Victor, but when the blast actually connected with the familiar armor and Doom fell to his knees, Tony already had a feeling that this was just another of his robot copies. He landed near it just to have “Doom” explode in his face. The armor took the blast, but Iron Man was thrown a good way across the street. The HUD went black for a second, before the suit rebooted itself. When he looked up the street was clear and there were no active Doombots in sight.

“Was that it? Where is Doom?” He was on his knees, not able to get up. The armor had apparently taken more of a thrashing than he'd initially expected and made even this small movement hard.

“There are no new attackers closing in,” T'Chala said. “It seems they have chosen to retreat.”

“Chosen?” Tony asked, not believing that things with Doctor Doom could ever be this easy.

He regretted asking the question the moment it had passed his lips and a loud crashing noise could be heard from a few blocks away, a shattering, loud boom that made the earth shake a little. He didn't need to look to know what was going on. “That was the Tower, right?” He let himself fall back to the ground, the armor making a loud clanking noise when it hit the concrete. “He's really taking this personally.”

“Do I want to know what you're talking about?” Steve asked from beside him.

“Do _I_ want to know how bad the Tower was hit?”

Steve looked out into the distance and down at him with a quirk of the lips. “It stands.”

“Thanks, that makes me feel so much better, Cap.”

“Come on, Iron Man. We need to stop Doom, before he finds whatever he is after.”

Tony slowly got up, nodded and propelled himself into the air, hovering above ground beside Cap and taking a look at the smoke rising up from Stark Towers 56th floor. There was nothing of interest on that level, so Tony expected that Doom was really only making a point this time.

* * *

“So what was that all about?” Reed asked him, when he visited him at the Baxter building two days later.

He smiled in a slightly self-depriciating way and admitted: “Pepper warned me not to send him that silly little Christmas card.”

“You sent him a card? For Christmas?” Reed chuckled. “Not even you would do that.” He laughed again, then saw the look on Tony's face and froze. “You're joking.” 

“Keep you friends close, but your enemies closer?”

“That doesn't make sense, Tony. Or do you send out holiday greeting to AIM, too?”

“I sent one to SHIELD. They're not always friendly either.”

“Very funny.”

“So, I guess, you'll not sign the card I'm going to send him for his birthday, then?”

Reed looked back at his calculations. “No, but I'm going to send you a thank you card, when he makes you his new arch nemesis.”

“Over holiday greetings?” Tony laughed.

“You do know that he basically hates me because we didn't get along in college?”

* * *

Doom was definitely not _impressed_ when he received a card for his birthday reading:

_You're not exactly a nice person, but I'm still pretty grateful for the whole Skrull thing – and also the way you kicked Amora's ass last week was pretty neat. So Happy Birthday and Happy Doomsday or whatever the holiday for this happy occasion is called in Latveria._

_No need to thank me in person this time, by the way._

“He's becoming a bigger nuisance than Richards...”

“My Lord?”

He waved the servant away. After all he had some planning to do.


End file.
